Pictures in Motion
I'm happy to see that my urge to create is growing strong again. While my anxieties are still getting in the way – I start panicking a bit every time I sit in front of the keyboard – I've discovered that music is an excellent self-medication for the problem. Doesn't seem to matter too much what the music is, though the panic will try to trick me into getting playlists "just right" as a way of stalling.
Another technique that's working quite well is to get working on one of my little comedy video productions. The great thing about those is that I can start putting the wheels in motion before the anxiety can kick in, and when the day comes to do the shoot, I've got too much invested, too many people involved, to back down or procrastinate. If only I could afford to do those as often as I want! But they aren't paying for themselves yet, so I need to stick with a day job – and since my last contract ended last year, I need a new one before I can indulge myself that way.
Damn, but working on those shoots makes me feel alive. The more I make, the more I want to do. Not just the slapstick comedy, either; I'm developing a powerful urge to make the Doctor Who fan film I've always wanted, or even an original project. I've had a couple scripts lying around for twenty years, ones that I've just realized would be within my reach… though they'd require some rewriting. They reek a bit of teenage sci-fi fan at the moment.
Must get job. Must make money. 43 isn't too late to start chasing my dreams, but it does mean there's no more time to waste.
Writer’s Block: Life is a masquerade
I am, though I’m not yet sure what I’m going to wear. A lot of the costumes I’ve been wearing to cons lately just aren’t especially appropriate for work (though I got away with one of them at my last job, years ago). Last year I wore a Starfleet uniform to work, and it went over well, but I’d hate to repeat the theme.
If a costume has to be made, I plan four or five months in advance – the more lead time the better. If I’m planning to buy, more like a month. As I’ve sucessfully (if sloppily) constructed my first garment on a sewing machine, I have the option of making my own from now on, but it turns out that’s nearly as expensive as a commission or a purchase, these days – who knew!
I do like to surprise folks with my costume choices when I can. What can I say? It’s the thespian in me.
EDIT: Just noticed that Halloween’s on a Saturday this year, so the whole “dressing up for work” thing is moot. 🙂
Writer’s Block: I May Be Crazy
… but it just may be a lunatic you’re looking for!
I have been able to imagine here much of what other people have seen, but to me it’s the grinning face of a fox. (Admittedly, one with oddly bifurcated ears.)
The smile is a Trickster’s smile, the smile of Loki, or Coyote, or Q. That smile promises only a relief from boredom – it does not promise either way whether you’ll enjoy that relief.
Writer’s Block: Firsts
My first entry dates back to October 2001 (holy heck) and is titled “Secrets”.
Such a strange feeling it is to go back through the time capsule of what was in my head seven-and-a-half years ago. My weird was goofier back then… I almost feel as though I’ve been refining it over the years.
